Major Life Update

Sometimes things in life take you by surprise. All of us, at some point, encounter moments, weeks, or years of change so unexpected that life just cannot go on the way it had been. Often these seasons of life are painful but lead to new ways of being, feeling, and thinking. When we remain open to the process and tune in to how God may be working in the messiness of our lives, we sometimes discover that we have arrived a little bit farther down the road at a deeper place of gratitude, truthfulness, and new life.

Anyone who has known me even casually over the past year or two knows that I’ve had my share of that kind of change. Some of it, I’ve chosen to talk/write about in a very public way – on this blog, as well as Facebook and Twitter. Much of it has been kept to myself. Knowing what to share and what not to share is tricky business in the Internet Age. Personal boundaries become fuzzy, and for some people, disappear altogether. A couple years ago, I decided to change the way I relate to social media, and have become more balanced in regard to keeping my private life private.

With that said, I know that my private life has public implications. I believe strongly in the value of community. I am, in part, a product of the people in my life . . . sometimes including the people online (though, I don’t believe for a minute that the deepest forms of community are possible online).

Meaningful changes have occurred in my world, though, and I am at a place where I want to share, in a more public way, the important things that have happened and are continuing to happen with me.  I will be brief with the information I share here, not as a reflection of the depth of the changes but because I believe there are many aspects of my personal life that are private, and even sacred.

One significant change that happened two years ago was that my marriage ended. Due in part to this reality, my employment with the denomination I worked for ended as well. These two factors gave birth to a four month long trip around the world, beginning in the fall of 2009 (which I’ve written about extensively on this blog). This trip was the catalyst for a season of pain, growth, excitement, freedom and change.

And then another quite unexpected and joyful surprise came into my life. In late summer 2010, I met a woman, and we began dating.  She is a Seattle native but was living and working in New York City.  During the next several months we talked for hundreds of hours on the phone and spent time together in both Seattle and New York City. Happily, she was offered a teaching position at Seattle University and moved home in early December. Our relationship grew quickly and as it deepened, we were both confident that God was leading us in specific, unique, and life-giving ways. So, a few days ago, on the island of Maui, I married a really amazing woman, Sarah.

While this is something I’m excited about, I’m not going to blog or post on Facebook about my marriage. I appreciate the people who have followed me here on the blog, as well as in other social media spaces, and I’m grateful for the interest you’ve taken in me. Thanks for your encouragement.

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  1. Wow and oh man and speechlessly happy for you, Steve. Now to see you, and meet Sarah….

  2. Steve,

    Congrats! Wonderful news. Praying you and Sarah have a wonderful future ahead of you!

  3. Well done son. Love to both of you. Dad

  4. Steve – I am so happy for you….. Many time I think of you, when people all around me talk about Community – you have made me think of my community and I just want to increase it. – Thanks so much for always listening to me. Again Congratulations – I am very happy for you. God Bless

    Karen Eccles

  5. Steve,

    Tami and I are delighted indeed! Congratulations!


  6. God is the ultimate orchestrator of lives. He knows exactly what we must go through to make the changes in us to continue to become His. Through each event or experience we go through he helps to guide us into our future with Him. I’m proud to have had you help to shape my life in the past as well. Much love brother. WoooooooooooooooHoooooooooo if you know what I mean.

  7. Congratulations Stephen!! I am so happy for you! I am looking forward to meeting Sarah!! God bless you as you begin your life together!! Love you

  8. Blessings of grace and joy on your marriage! May our God continue to be lead you and Sarah in his
    great adventure.

  9. Congrats Steve! That’s great news!!!

  10. I am so happy God has blessed you in this awesome way. We
    are happy to welcome Sarah as our daughter-in-law.

  11. Contests Steve! I am happy for you and celebrate with you (
    even from afar) 🙂

  12. Wow! Steve…and now Sarah…that is awesome news. How is it possible that even though I have never met Sarah, I feel completely confident that she is a good fit for you? I don’t know how, but I do know we are excited to meet her whenever the chance may arise. Welcome, Sarah! And congratulations to you both!

  13. Congratulations Stephen and welcome to the family, Sarah. I
    love you and look forward to meeting your bride.

  14. So happy for you and Sarah! May all God’s blessings be on your new life.

  15. Glad to hear about your good news. I can appreciate how difficult the last few years have been for you. Would love to find some time to catch up. After talking with Chris Marshall it sounds it could do me some good.

  16. Wow! Congratulations my friend! J

  17. May the Lord bless this new phase of your life.

  18. Congratulations Steve! Very happy for you. A little slow online these days, but missed you at the Think Tank a few days back, so I thought I’d check your blog. Wonderful news and again congratulations.


  19. I know that we are hardly on close confidential bases anymore, but I was reading your blogs and felt compelled to break the silence. Our long talks of long ago always helped me as I worked on my own personal relationships- Now I find your blogs inspirational in so many ways. They encourage me to deepen my closest relationships by looking upwards for guidance. I never took the time to thank you then, but I truly thank you now. Congrats on your new life choices! I wish you the best!

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